For my full Bio, education and experience, please visit CommunicatingLove.com/Janell
"Janell" means "God is gracious". I strive to live up to my name as I travel through life's grand adventure. I know I am not perfect, therefore my perception is not perfect as well. however, both you and I have perceptions which impact each other and all others with whom they are shared. The more we share, whether by voice or example, the greater influence we have on the world around us. Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father which is in heaven (Matthew 5:16 KJV).
"I like myself. I'm glad I'm ME. There's no one else I'd rather be." Karen Beaumont (Childrens' Writer)
I have coached myself through three decades of Perception Reframing, surrounding myself with many mentors, and filling my mind with countless questions to reach beyond my current understanding. I have generally always been a happy person, with my focus on being the recipient of overflowing and energizing joy in my scheming to serve and bless others lives. I have never seriously wished for a life of any other than my own. However, because of lessons learned from some intense life experiences, I am discovering a new-found steadiness and inner-peace of Forgiveness and Self-Patience. I strongly feel that if you are not happy now, if you can be so brave as to see a glimpse of the world the way that I do, you can learn to taste the sweetness of JOY for yourself.
As I share with you my experiences and the way I view life (my PERCEPTION), I encourage you to keep and live by the Good and the Truth that is already within you. One intention with this blog is to help reinforce the positive values that are already a part of the way you live. Another intention is to prompt you to consider and examine how and why you believe what you do. When you look at life from another angle or vantage point and consider alternatives, one of two things happen when you are seeking Truth, Healing, and Joy: either you realize that you have been choosing a good way to live all along; or, you gain increased motivation to change and improve yourself. This process is what I term REFRAMING, or consciously choosing healthier, happier, more friendly biases through which to view the world around you.
Anyone who knows me knows that Christianity is of high importance to me. I graduated four years of Seminary at 18 and continued equivalent of four additional years of religious studies, being awarded by The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints completion of the Institute of Religion program for young adults.
Part of what Christianity teaches is that others need to be allowed to not make the same choices as I do. Christ teaches to be Kind to others who are different. I know some Muslims and some from the LGBTQ community who are more Kind than some professed Christians. When making friends and associations, I look for common ground in beliefs and work to build on that in my relationships.
"Just for Today...Include Everyone" (Mary Engelbreit, Just for Today, Be Happy: A Year's Worth of Inspiring Thoughts).
It is with this perspective that led me to certify as an ABA Behavior Intervention Specialist working with children and teens with disabilities. I did this professionally for 3+ years and then transferred my skills to the mental health field where I have been working 2+ years with kids, parents, and families with multiple diagnoses given to the client and often multiple members of the family. This creates unique and sometimes extreme family dynamics that call for individualized creative solutions.
As the daughter of a marriage counselor who wanted to help people in an important way (like her dad), I grew up applying this observance to detail to relational patterns and cause and response choices of others that I would observe in others' behaviors. I also observed my mom and other positive mentoring adults that surrounded me. From their examples, I learned to serve with kindness.
"If a nation that expects to be ignorant and free, in a state of civilization, it expects what never was and never will be" (Thomas Jefferson).
Along with Kindness, another value I keep close is Learning. The 'silver lining' for me from life's challenges is an answer to the question, 'What can I Learn from this?' When my wisdom teeth were pulled, they had to keep pausing and take their hands out of my mouth so they could understand my words asking them to explain as they worked through the procedure. Much of my understanding of life has come from pondering observations from my own experiences and those of others.
I love questions. I practice asking good questions and thinking up better questions. I am grateful to my husband for also having this value. Though our communication isn't perfect (yet), he frequently demonstrates efforts to help me feel heard, valued, and loved. He helps to fill our home with good information and learning. We listen to lectures together presented by college professors on topics of Psychology, Sociology, and others. He keeps himself informed on what is going on in the world and seeks to make the world a better place. This helps him feel connected with the human race and grateful for his blessings. Life-long learning is important. Honesty, Inspiration, Loyalty, and Trust are products of Truth. I am a seeker of truth.
"Keep your eyelids up And see what you can see" (Dr. Seuss, And to Think that I Saw it On Mulberry Street).
Even though this book is about a boy who thinks up an imaginary tale to tell his dad when he gets home from school, I like this line from the book and wonder what the dad is trying to teach his son. What kind of a boy was the dad? My eyes were open as a girl to others' mistakes and how not to get in trouble, but also to how I could help others be happier, looking for ways to serve. As a young adult and now, I have my eyes open to see the beauty in people that surround me: the elderly couple holding hands, the love of a mother I see holding her sleeping child, the love of an aunt laughing with her niece, the willing three-year-old who helps his mom clean. I also love nature. I love colors, textures, healing music, the warmth of light, and the peacefulness of snow, the silver lining on the clouds. As an artist, I was born with observant eyes to see and notice details and connections.
Eventually, we will each find what we are looking for. What are you looking for? What do you have your eyes open to?
With a listening ear to understand, Kindness, Beauty, and Learning are three lenses through which I choose to see the world, and this has brought me great Joy and Peace to move through each day with less anxiety or distress about all that is not as it should be. I try to focus on what I can do today, and try to be okay with that. I close my eyes at night with self-forgiveness and wake the next day with new hope to be and do a little better.
May you live a more intentioned life with the choices before you, seeking knowledge and wisdom in your journey here on Planet Earth.
