"The Tale of the Two Wolves" is a powerful story often attributed to the Cherokee people. It goes like this:
An old Cherokee chief was teaching his grandson about life. He said, "A fight is going on inside me," he told the boy. "It is a terrible fight and it is between two wolves. One is evil—he is anger, envy, sorrow, regret, greed, arrogance, self-pity, guilt, resentment, inferiority, lies, false pride, superiority, and ego." He continued, "The other is good—he is joy, peace, love, hope, serenity, humility, kindness, benevolence, empathy, generosity, truth, compassion, and faith. The same fight is going on inside you—and inside every other person, too."
The grandson thought about it for a minute and then asked his grandfather, "Which wolf will win?"
The old Cherokee simply replied, "The one you feed."
This story is a beautiful reminder that we have the power to choose our thoughts and actions, and that our choices shape who we become.
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Applied Behavior Analysis (ABA) -- "Differential Reinforcement of Other Behavior and "Differential Reinforcement of Incompatible Behavior"
These here are two ABA techniques to demonstrate this principle further of focusing on the good, helping the good to grow with love and attention, and the bad to wither by the wayside from neglect:
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Do you believe in Karma? Have you heard of "The Secret" or "The Law of Attraction"? Are the scripture verses on praying for what you need ("Ask and ye shall receive; knock and it shall be opened.") familiar to you? Although there are some differences in these examples, all of them entail focusing our personal energies into the things that we want to have grow, increase, and flourish.
In the garden, the plants that are watered and get tended to are the ones that have a better chance of flourishing. Yes, it is important to pull the weeds, but once they are pulled, they should get thrown out--not replanted. It is a happier life to be admiring the flowers than to be cursing the weeds.
Forgive 70 times 7. Start anew and let others start anew.
Talk about the things you want to have happen and don't feed the things you want to have die off. "Don't think of a purple-spotted elephant." You have to literally think of the thing you're not supposed to think of so you can know what not to think about.
I have heard that our ears don't hear the words "not" and "don't". You have likely heard of "Reverse Psychology" and even seen it in action when a rebellious personality is tempted: "Don't snitch the cookies that are hidden in the cupboard." ... "Thank you for telling me where they are..."
"Positive psychology", on the other hand, is a branch of psychology that focuses on the study and promotion of positive aspects of human life, such as happiness, well-being, and flourishing. Unlike traditional psychology, which often concentrates on mental illness and dysfunction, positive psychology aims to understand and enhance the factors that contribute to a fulfilling and meaningful life.
Here are some key principles of positive psychology:
Focus on Strengths: Positive psychology emphasizes identifying and nurturing individual strengths and virtues, rather than just addressing weaknesses and problems.
Positive Emotions: Experiencing positive emotions like joy, gratitude, and love is seen as essential for overall well-being and can help build resilience against life's challenges.
Engagement: Being fully engaged in activities that align with one's strengths and interests can lead to a state of flow, where time seems to fly by and one feels deeply absorbed and fulfilled.
Relationships: Positive psychology highlights the importance of building and maintaining healthy, supportive relationships, as they are crucial for emotional well-being and life satisfaction.
Meaning and Purpose: Finding meaning and purpose in life, whether through work, hobbies, or relationships, is considered vital for long-term happiness and fulfillment.
Accomplishment: Setting and achieving goals, and experiencing a sense of accomplishment, can boost self-esteem and overall well-being.
Positive psychology is defined as the scientific study of what makes life most worth living, focusing on strengths and positive experiences (positivepsychology.com). It emphasizes character strengths and behaviors that allow individuals to build a life of meaning and purpose, moving beyond merely surviving to flourishing (psychologytoday.com). The field was significantly developed by psychologists like Martin Seligman and Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi (wikipedia/positive-psychology).
Additional sources for learning and study:
- The Positive Psychology Center at the University of Pennsylvania is a leading institution in the field, focusing on research, education, and the dissemination of positive psychology.
- Harvard Health provides an overview of positive psychology, emphasizing its role in fostering happiness and emotional wellness.
- New York University has published a detailed article on what positive psychology is and why it matters.
- The Oxford Handbook of Positive Psychology includes a chapter on positive institutions, laws, and policies, discussing how institutions can foster human flourishing.
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